Thursday, July 19, 2012

Ovaries are Working!

Well my ovaries are definitely working and growing those follicles because I feel constant twinges and pulls. It's kind of a neat feeling, but it hurts at the same time. Other than that, I feel GOOD. For the first night since starting the stims I feel happy and not concerned about the cycle.

This is due, in part, to the moment I had yesterday...I was lying in bed completely upset and devastated about increasing my meds. I felt my heart rate increasing, and all of the sudden my breathing got extremely shallow, and I realized at that moment that this..worry..this silly. I have NO control over what happens in this situation, and the only person that does is God. I know that He has a plan that is far greater than any "plan" I may have for myself, and I just have to trust it.


That's what I'm working on. I need to trust that whatever happens, good or bad, it's the way things are supposed to happen. My husband has a feeling that this egg retrieval will go through, and our first transfer will work. I have that feeling too, but I'm trying not to get my hopes too high. Then again, I'm trying not to be too pessimistic. Again, trust. Trust allows me to not worry quite as much about whether it will or will not allows me to see the beauty of the entire process, and it truly is beautiful.

I held my stomach today while lying in bed, and I realized for the first time that one of these little follicles growing inside of me right now could eventually be part of my child. And I was content.

So here's to trusting the rest of the cycle, and to trusting God! 


  1. I cannot wait to hear how your appointment goes Friday:) When I read your prior post my wife and I were surprised that you were on such a low dose of follistim. My wife started on 175 or 200 mg or ml whatever it is.

    I think you will see at your next appointment that the follicles have grown and there are more!!

    You are taking the right approach. It is really not in your hands whatever happens happens for a reason. I truly hope that this round is successful for the two of you.

    One thing I think you need to focus on is the positives of this expericence. I know there are things you can dwell on but you have to look at the glass half full :)

    Question, is your insurance paying for any of this??? I know this is a very expensive process.

    Keeping you in my thoughts...and good luck to the both of you!!!

  2. Hi John! Thank you for your comment. My next appointment did show a great increase in my estrogen and a good increase in my follicles. They upped my dose again. They were severely worried, with my CF, about overstimulating me. So I started off on really small doses of meds.

    I think my biggest problem has actually been constipation (which I never get) which has led to so much pain with these meds. Now that that's getting taken care of, I'm REALLY able to look at all the positives..and it's TRULY amazing. I'm so thrilled to be able to go through this process, and I'm blessed to have such a supportive husband to get me through it.

    Insurance is paying for most of it. We had to drop a decent amount for the freezing of embryos, and we dropped a heft copay for the drugs. We'll also pay a percentage of surgery costs, but that's it. It will probably run us around 3,000 when all is said and done..which I KNOW is incredible.

    Thanks for the continued thoughts and good luck wishes!!


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