"Welcome to Type 1 Diabetes!" and Other Pregnancy Updates

"Welcome to Type 1 Diabetes!"

This is the sentence my endocrinologist told me today when I went in for my check-up. Up until now, my sugars have really made sense for the most part, but not anymore! Now my sugars will spike up after a meal and then plummet over a matter of 60 minutes or so. For example, yesterday afternoon I ate and took my normal amount of insulin only to find myself at 200 two hours after my meal (not the number you want to see), and then an hour later I was 60 with no signs of low blood sugar.

Apparently, this is what being a type 1 diabetic is like. Let me say, I'm glad I'm not a type 1 diabetic. I am SO frustrated with these sugars because I have no idea where they will be at any given time, and I'm not symptomatic when I'm low anymore. 

So we increased my bolus rate yet again, and I see her in two weeks to make sure that my sugars are still doing okay. She said overall I'm doing "phenomenally" which made me feel good, but I still hate seeing these high numbers!

31 weeks and starting to feel like my belly is starting to grow again

In other news, I'm 31 weeks tomorrow which means only 7 weeks remain until I meet my little girl. Where on EARTH did time go? I've been fighting the overwhelming fatigue of third trimester + cystic fibrosis. Most days all I want to do is sleep, and I usually indulge myself in this (I still do treatments, eat, and try to walk a bit). Surprisingly, I felt great yesterday (which also happened to be my husband's birthday) so I went to the store, did some cleaning, and made dinner.

Well that was a mistake.

I think I took all that awesome energy for granted because I started having Braxton Hicks every five minutes for about an hour before they finally went to every 10 minutes after drinking plenty of water and keeping my feet up. I had my doctor appointment today, and I noticed that if I'm on my feet (even today) more than ten minutes at a time then the contractions start coming back. Makes me a bit nervous, but I've got my high-risk OB appointment tomorrow so I will be sure to ask him about it.

I also have CF clinic tomorrow, and quite honestly I'm not expecting much as far as my lung function goes. I'm struggling now, but not in a "chest infection" way..just because baby is getting bigger and bigger.

So with all of that, I guess tomorrow is a big day which will help me (hopefully) feel better about these contractions. I'll be sure to update soon. 

30 weeks

30 weeks, and I feel pretty tiny actually. I think I expected to be bigger at this point.

Dear baby girl,

There was a part of me that really didn't think I'd make it to the third trimester. I had faith, but I worried that something would go wrong because my body has failed me in so many other regards throughout my life. After talking with other women who have gone through infertility, this seems to be a pretty common feeling and worry. Now, that part of me is hoping all goes well with delivery.

It is so hard to believe that in eight short weeks you will be here, and I will be holding you in my arms and kissing your tiny face and hands. It's so surreal that I can hardly find words to describe it. You move so much inside of me every day, but I still have a hard time imagining you as a newborn that I can hold in my arms.

I have been so very blessed to carry you, and I love you  more than I could have ever imagined already. You are my miracle baby girl, and it seems that the entire world is so excited to meet you and hold you.

As I get closer to my due date, I've realized there are a few things I never want to forget about this experience (well really I never want to forget any of it because it's been such a blessing) and about your personality in the womb.

- You LOVE to stretch. You are a kicker and mover, but you are even more of a stretcher. You love to push your back out on my right side and then stick your feet out on my far left. It's such a funny feeling! Now, your daddy and I were joking that you are trying to escape through my bellybutton because you push so hard and for so long at a time that it seems you want out.

- You get a lot of hiccups. You get hiccups all the time. I feel them almost every day (sometimes when I'm really busy I don't notice them), and it seems like they bother you which makes me feel so sad for you. Once you start in with the hiccups, you start kicking and moving around so much for a few minutes. It seems like you almost realize they aren't going away and give up fighting them after a little bit. Each time they happen, I try to rub your back and tell you it will be okay. I feel so bad for you.

- You don't startle. There are a LOT of loud noises in this house. Goodness, my coughing alone is enough to wake a city block, but you don't seem to mind. You may have been startled by a noise two or three times total this whole pregnancy, but otherwise you are perfectly content.

- You seem so easygoing. Obviously this is silly to say already, but you just feel like overall you are so content in my tummy (other than those darn hiccups). I can't possibly explain this feeling to anyone, but I just think you are a happy baby already.

- You don't like contractions or ultrasounds. I've been getting so many Braxton Hicks recently, and I notice that each time I have one you stop moving until it's over. You seem to just wait it out, but it certainly stops you from what you were doing. The same thing happens with ultrasound. You could be moving all over the place, but once they put your picture up on the screen you are as quiet as can be. I'm curious to see how you'll do with the NSTs over the next 8 weeks.

I truly feel like I'm getting to know you so much already, and I'm getting more and more excited and anxious for your birthday. I have a hard time believing it will happen because I have waited so long for this day, and I couldn't be happier to be blessed with you.

Clinic Update and 27 Weeks

Despite how awful I was feeling last week, it seems that I have managed to kick it on my own. My PFTs were stable yesterday (sitting at 79% for my FEV1). My FVC is a little bit down, but since I have a pretty awesome baby bump pushing up on my lungs, it's only to be expected. So, my doctors agreed to continue with upped CPT and avoid IVs for now, which was a huge relief for me as I really don't want to expose our little girl to anything I don't have to.

My sugars are still kind of crazy, but I'm managing them as well as I can. I think this will be a constant struggle now until the day of delivery, but that's okay. Anything is worth it for this little one..that's for sure!

My weight is doing extremely well, and I have gained 22 pounds now! It's hard to believe, but it's so amazing to see the number on the scale continuing to rise. I do eat five huge meals a day so that may have something to do with it. :)

And I'm officially 27 weeks (and one day). I don't know where time is going, but she will be here in just 11 short weeks now. I'm starting to feel the third trimester fatigue (all I want to do is sleep right now..just like the first trimester all over again), and I'm starting to feel more uncomfortable all the time. I spend a lot of time on my hands and knees to alleviate the back pain I feel, and my husband is amazing with all of his massages he offers.

This pregnancy has been amazing, but I am starting to see hints of the time when I'm going to be so ready to be done with pregnancy. I have days off and on now when I feel SO miserable and sore that I wonder how I can handle making it to 38 weeks. I know I will, but I do wonder sometimes.

Feeling Under the Weather

I think CF has reared it's ugly head because I certainly am not feeling the best. 

Yesterday I started in with streaking every time I brought up sputum. It wasn't much. I would say about a teaspoon the entire day (really minuscule amount), but still it is unusual for me. I wouldn't be too concerned if I wasn't feel run-down as well. Just exhausted, sore throat, headache.

The streaking stopped today, then came back, then stopped again. I got about three hours of sleep total as I coughed my way through the rest of the night last night (thankfully I slept a lot today). Just feeling miserable.

I did place a call to my CF doctor, but she must have been incredibly busy because she did not return my call today (very very unusual). 

And now, I have sharp lung pain in my right lung. Just started about an hour or so ago. It's not constant, but it certainly is present. 

I think it may be time to break down and go on antibiotics. Since I'm pregnant, no orals I normally take are safe and we're probably looking at IVs. I haven't had IVs since 2008 (at that time it was only a precautionary measure because of having sinus surgery), and I haven't had IVs for a real infection since 2005 so I shouldn't complain. And I won't. All that matters is my and baby girl's safety and health. 

I just hope my doctor returns my call tomorrow morning. If not, I'll be calling again! 

The Expected and Unexpected of a CF Pregnancy

It's so hard to believe that I am now 25 weeks. I only have 13 precious weeks left of being pregnant before my little girl finally arrives. I truly don't even know what to make of it, and to be honest it still doesn't feel quite real.

I wanted to write this post because I feel like there are many things I never expected with this pregnancy, and many of my original expectations were shattered. Now every pregnancy is different as is every case of cystic fibrosis, but hopefully this will be reassuring to someone else out there who is currently thinking of or trying to conceive.

Blown Expectation #1: Pregnancy with CF would be very hard.
This has been one of the biggest shockers to me as I've gone through the pregnancy. I had always heard general horror stories of how bad you feel in pregnancy. You know...miserable, exhausted, nauseous, sore all the time, etc. Obviously most of these people I have talked to do not have a chronic disease. I'm not saying there aren't days when I feel bad because I certainly do, but then again that's how I felt with my CF anyway. I'd have days (prior to pregnancy) when I felt miserable; I'd be in so much pain from CF tummy issues, I'd be exhausted and sore from coughing so much, and all I would want to do is sleep. I promise you that pregnancy has NOT been worse than those days. Personally, I believe that for many (normally healthy) people, pregnancy is an introduction to something many CFers know about: The Spoon Theory.

If you're unfamiliar with the spoon theory, please take time to read the linked article as it is quite accurate. Basically, for those with a chronic illness, you only have so many "spoons" that you can use a day. When those "spoons" are gone, then you can't do anything else. It's about reserving energy for what's important and some (most) days you have fewer "spoons" in your reserve than you'd like, but there's not much you can do about it. We CFers are used to this. We understand that we have to make important decisions based on how we will feel later or if we'll have time to get our treatments in. Pregnancy is similar because you have to prioritize since you are exhausted or too sore/big to do much.

Truthfully, after dealing with CF for my entire life, Pregnancy has not thrown anything at me so far that I can't handle. It's been a beautiful experience and when I'm hurting, exhausted, or nauseous, I just remind myself that I've felt much worse.

Unexpected #1: CFRD is hard in pregnancy
This was an expected but unexpected at the same time. I knew it wouldn't be easy to control my CFRD in pregnancy, but I didn't realize just how hard it would be. My sugars are crazy now that I'm pregnant, and when I hit a high number I immediately feel so guilty and worried that I'm hurting my little girl. The crazy thing is that I can eat the same meal two days in a row with the same amount of insulin and I'll have two completely different sugars two hours post dinner. It's so frustrating because I just never know what to expect fully. I am doing my best to keep my sugars lower, but sometimes I hit a really high number and I just have to work on getting it down as fast as possible. I then sit and pray that God will protect my little miracle girl because I certainly am not doing the best job of it. This has been the area where I have felt the most overwhelming guilt during this pregnancy, and it's so hard not to worry.

Unexpected #2: I wouldn't want more kids
Ok, I should start off by saying that if I was healthy, I'd want at least two more kids. Before getting pregnant with our little girl, I knew I wanted more than one. Both my husband and I felt this way. Then once I became pregnant, I realized I couldn't go through this again and risk my health when I already have a daughter at home who needs her mom. I've decided that (unless it happens naturally) our little girl will be our only child. It hurts to think about this, but I also know I can't jeopardize my health for my own selfishness.


I have more of these that I've thought of as the pregnancy has gone on, but this post is getting quite long already. I just know that I have been incredibly blessed to be able to carry this little girl, and I can't wait to meet her in three months! 

24 Weeks

It's been a long time since my last post, but I'm halfway through my 24th week and so far things are going really well.

My lung function is at 79% which is much better than it was at my previous clinic appointment. I feel like this is a perfectly acceptable number since baby is really starting to crowd my lungs a bit more now.

My latest A1c is a 5.4% which I'm very proud of, although my sugars have started rising a bit more recently. I've been hitting higher numbers than I'd like after dinner, but I do try to get them down as fast as I can.

My weight is currently at 138 which means I have put on 21 pounds since the pregnancy began!!

Overall, I feel really good! I certainly can't complain. I've really enjoyed being pregnant, and even when I wake up every hour to flip over or go the bathroom it's still amazing to me.

We are starting birthing classes tomorrow (Bradley method), and I'm pretty excited about them. I think it will be a great help to both myself and my husband as we prepare for our baby girl's arrival.

My biggest complaint so far this pregnancy (though I'm really trying not to complain) is upper back pain, and my biggest craving has been cold cereal (Cheerios, oatmeal squares, golden grahams).

I can't believe that I only have about 14 weeks left until I meet my little girl. Time sure is flying by!

24 weeks!