Ultrasound Update

Earlier, I posted a really short blog about the following information. Now, having time to reflect upon it and relax, I have edited the post (the information is the same, just written better now). 

Early this morning, I received a call from U of C regarding my ultrasound results.  The nurse, Karen, stated that there was nothing that required immediate attention, but there were some serious concerns about what the films showed.  She said that my high-risk OB felt the best course of action was to be set up with a reproductive endocrinologist (RE for short) who would help with infertility.

Immediately, upon hearing the word infertility, my heart sank.  I have always in the back of my mind thought we would need help getting pregnant. I have worried about it since I was a child due to my CF and very painful/irregular periods.  Hearing your fears confirmed, however, is a whole other feeling.  I was heartbroken.  I sat sobbing on the couch after getting off the phone with her, trying to compose myself.

The only thing I could figure out to do was to write.  That’s why this blog was so all over the place earlier.  I needed to get it out of my system and I wanted to share it with all of you, who were wondering about the results.  The writing helped ease my sadness and fears, and helped me realize that I needed to start a plan of action. 

Karen (my high-risk OB’s nurse) had set up the first available appointment with the RE.  She had wanted to get me in TODAY, but unfortunately he was 100% booked and could not see me until he returned from his 2 and ½ week trip out of the country.  She set up the appointment for Nov. 21 and told me to call the office to set up insurance and get directions.

I called the office and am already very impressed with the kindness of the staff.  The receptionist was amazingly comforting while explaining how everything would work.  She gave me the directions, including the fact that the office offers free parking – amazing when you consider it’s in DOWNTOWN Chicago.  The office is still through U of C, but it is their downtown campus – looks like we’ll be doing some Christmas shopping after the appointment!   She also gave me the link for all of the paperwork (all 10 pages of it, no exaggeration) that needs to be filled out prior to my arrival. 

From there, I called the insurance company.  Again, I was so grateful for their compassion and help with this situation.  They explained my benefits fully (what would/wouldn’t be covered).  They made sure I understood the insurance jargon, and they reassured me that they would be there if I needed help understanding any paperwork further down the line.  I will say, we are VERY blessed by our insurance coverage.  Almost everything will be covered. We will have to pay for part of it, but not the whole thing. Thank goodness.

After getting off the phone with the insurance company, the RE’s office called back and said they had a cancellation for next Monday!!! I am so grateful that I won’t have to wait 3 weeks to see the doctor. We can see him, figure out exactly what the ultrasound showed, and set up further testing.  I read the website and it said after the initial consultation, it will be 4-6 weeks worth of testing before they set up a plan. 

So how am I going to handle this? That’s the next question.  The answer: I’m making it a positive experience.  Yes, I had always wanted to have a baby naturally, without medical help, but that’s just not going to be possible.  I confided in one of my good friends earlier, and she said something very accurate: It will still be our baby – whether it happens naturally, from a petri dish, or I find one in the  driveway.  It will still be our child and we will love him/her the same.  And really, that’s the goal, isn’t it? A happy, healthy baby, regardless of the method it took to get there. 

I’m also deciding that this will be a way for me to form a closer relationship to God and to form a closer bond with my husband.  We will have to be there for each other like never before through this process.  It will strengthen our love and our marriage. 

If you've gotten this far and are still reading this - I'm impressed! I'm sorry it's so long, just a lot to share.  When I started this blog, I decided I would share everything with my readers.  That hasn’t changed.  There are a vast number of women who go through infertility, and there are many cysters who go through it as well.  There’s not enough information out there, and I will share my experience, my thoughts, my worries, and my accomplishments with you all.  I can guarantee that there will be times when what I share is emotional and poorly-written, but it will all be part of this journey.  If it can provide one OUNCE of comfort for someone else, then it’s all worth it to me. 

Also, keeping with what I said last night, I feel like I need to add what I'm thankful for today.  I'm thankful that I have access to tremendous doctors and medical support staff. I know many people are not nearly as fortunate as I am. I'm truly blessed.  I am thankful for the insurance we have, and for how much they are willing to cover during this process.  Also, I am very fortunate for my support system; my husband, mother, sisters, friends, and my CF community. I honestly don’t know how I would be handling this without that system.  Wow, am I blessed!!

Welcome November

Winter is an etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all.  ~Stanley Horowitz


Happy November everyone!


I thought this quote was beautiful, and I felt a need to share it with you all.  


November is historically a good month for me. I always feel a peace and warmth in this month, and today as the sun shone brightly across the sky, and the remaining leaves were fluttering down to the ground, I felt calm.  Since November brings Thanksgiving, I've decided to include at least one sentence in each post about what I'm grateful for this month.  I believe that gratitude is extremely important, and November is the perfect month to share it with others.  


Today, November 1, 2011, I am grateful for all of my readers.  I am continuously blessed to have people around the world reading and commenting on my writing. This blog has been life-changing, and I am so glad that I have found an outlet for my emotions with CF that also allows me to teach.   There are days where I feel like I have nothing worthwhile to say and others where I want to shout til the world can hear me.  I also feel like you, my readers, make me dedicated to posting all the time. This dedication, in turn, creates a better writer out of me.  From the bottom of my heart, thank you all for taking the time to read my blog.  


I called my hospital regarding my ultrasound results, and I should be hearing a call back about them tomorrow. My doctor's nurse confirmed what the tech had said: the right ovary is invisible and there are multiple cysts in my left ovary. She was unsure if it was urgent or not, but said that she would have the doctor check the scans tomorrow and she would call me back. I'm eagerly awaiting that phone call.  


Other than that, not much is going on around here. I'm finding the more I try to control things in my life, the more out of control they become. I think this is God telling me to let him take over - that's my goal for this month. I feel a deep need to connect spiritually with the Lord, and I'm planning on working on it as much as possible.  I know faith has helped me heal many wounds, feel confident in life, and worry less. I need to start getting back to a faith-driven life desperately.  I'm just thankful that God gives us many chances because I seem to screw up a lot :-/


As we ease into this month, I hope you all are having a wonderful week. I challenge you to also think about what you are grateful for each day for a month straight :) It helps put everything in perspective.  

CFRD appointment and Ultrasound

Today was an interesting day, that's for sure.

I had my endocrinologist appointment to discuss my CFRD (my regular doctor is back from maternity leave now, so I wanted to see her).  She was actually really happy with my numbers and said she wasn't concerned at all about getting them under control during pregnancy. We came to the conclusion that during pregnancy, I will be put on an insulin pump so that I don't have to worry about wanting to eat at anytime during the day.  But for now, I'm going to continue what I'm doing and add the most minimal amount of NPH (long lasting) insulin as possible at night time.  Hopefully this will help control my overnight high.

Then, she told me she had bad news.  She's leaving the hospital to move to Atlanta.  I promise you that I was almost in tears. I love this doctor and I feel like she really grasped CFRD and worked well with it, and now she's leaving.  She will put me back with the previous doctor (whom I didn't necessarily care for) at the end of November when she leaves. This was my last time seeing her...and I'm very saddened by this.  I'm sure it will all be fine, but once you build a rapport with a doctor, you hate to see them leave.

After that, I went to get an ultrasound done since my high-risk OB wanted a baseline to have on file.  I ended up having to have both types of ultrasound which is not the most pleasant experience.  Then, when the ultrasound tech had spent about 10 minutes on one area I asked her what was wrong.  The problem, she said, was that she couldn't find my right ovary.  Well after fully looking for 5 more minutes, it was determined that my right ovary was nowhere to be found on my right side.

The last ultrasound I had, due to a 5 cm ovarian cyst, showed that my right ovary was on the left side.  I told her that and she proceeded to look, but couldn't find it there either.  Instead, she saw multiple cysts in my left ovary.

So with that said, I'm not sure where my right ovary is or if it even exists in my body, and it looks like my left ovary is a little screwed up.  This could be why I'm not ovulating, and I have a feeling I might be visiting my high-risk OB or infertility a little sooner than expected.

High-Risk OB

Warning: Do not read this post if you are at all uncomfortable with words like cervix, or mucus!

I just returned home from my visit with the high-risk OB and I'm feeling so much more confident about TTC.  My doctor is up at University of Chicago, just like every other doctor. This is nice because all the departments can talk to each other if anything ever happens.

I really liked the OB that I was referred to. He has a very laid back and calm personality which is exactly what I (as an uptight, nervous woman) will need when I'm pregnant. We went over all of my medical history and all of my medications. He did a full exam and scheduled an ultrasound for next week, but other than that he doesn't feel the need for any more tests at this point in time. I've had a full cardio workup, so he's not too concerned there. He is perfectly ok with me getting pregnant and in fact said he has no concerns about a future pregnancy.  He has had other CF patients and he said that the patients that were approved of being healthy enough to have a pregnancy have done very well.  It is comforting to know that your doctor has taken care of other patients with the same condition.

I was going to ask him about Mucinex since I have seen others on the forums that have gotten pregnant after using it, until he said that my cervical mucus looks....NORMAL. I promise you if I wasn't on that little exam table, I might have fallen to the ground. I was expecting him to say that it was non-existent or that it was very thick..but nope..normal.  We also agreed that the main problem seems to be that I'm not ovulating, but as I have not been off of the pill for over a year, he's not terribly concerned by that factor. He wants me to keep trying until January. If at that point we still are not pregnant, he is referring me to the infertility clinic.  So, if my silly body will just ovulate there is a real chance we could conceive on our own.  I'm stunned by this news..absolutely stunned.

So after an hour and a half meeting/exam with him, he walked out of the room, giving me the following advice, "Now, go get pregnant!"

I left feeling content, shocked, and confident.  When I walked in, there was some concern that he would tell me I'm not healthy enough for a pregnancy or that he is too concerned of my health to go through with a pregnancy. Having those fears eased is the best feeling in the world!!

High-Risk OB Prep

On Monday, I shared with everyone how excited I was about visiting the high-risk OB/GYN.  I feel like this is the logical next step in my pregnancy journey, and hopefully he will have some advice regarding our attempts TTC. I have been carefully following another cyster's blog (Inhaling Hope - who also has EXCITING news to share!) and she wrote a post about having a list of 20-ish questions to ask the high-risk OB/GYN.  I'm currently in the process of coming up with my own list and adding in questions that she was generous enough to share with me.  I want to feel educated and at-ease when I leave the office tomorrow.

While my excitement is not to be understated, I'm also feeling somewhat sad. I have always wanted to get pregnant right around this time so that I can tell my family/friends at Christmas time. I've always (I started thinking about this around age 10..honestly) had this perfect idea of how I would share the news, and if I were pregnant now, I would be right around 12 weeks come Christmas.  Unfortunately, I'm not pregnant yet and who knows how long it will be. I think I need to stop creating my own plans and ideas and let God take over.  Whenever it happens will be wonderful, and I'll find a unique way to tell my family no matter what month it is :)

On that note, I plan to finish my list of questions today and hopefully make a loaf of banana bread. It's extremely dreary here today, with high winds and gallons of rain. It's one of those days where I can hear my bed calling my name loudly while my body defiantly pushes toward the excessive amount of work that needs to be done.  I hope to spend some time working on my novel later this week, but I feel like all the other chores constantly prevent me from doing this.

I wish everyone a blessed and wonderful Wednesday. Congratulations to Inhaling Hope on her wonderful news and congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Ronnie Sharpe on the arrival of their "peanut," Mckenna!